The Lodestar

What matters most in Christian life are not the special spiritual powers we have, known as ‘spiritual gifts ‘, which are bestowed upon us by the Holy Spirit. These gifts can include prophecy, healing, and speaking in tongues. However, love is of greater importance. Exercising spiritual gifts without love is like being ’a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal’ (1 Cor 13:1). That is why Paul concludes the elaborate description of spiritual gifts that leads the reader to the next chapter on love by saying, ‘And I will show you a still more excellent way’ (1 Cor 12:31).

One of the most important characteristics of love is patience. Moreover, love and patience are so important for spiritual life that they are clustered together in the list of the fruit of the spirit. This list, mentioned in Galatians 5:22—23, refers to the qualities produced in a person’s life when the Holy Spirit guides them. These qualities include love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

Patience means delaying our responses to external triggers, such as the actions, attitudes, opinions, and so on of other people in our lives. It is also the disposition we hold when things do not happen the way we want and when we want.

Children may not grow the way their parents hope they will. They make choices on education, hobbies, careers, marriage, and so on that crush their parents’ hopes for them. It may take some time and effort for a colleague to catch up with the boss's expectations. Patience is the length of the gap between our expectations and others’ performance.

In these trying circumstances, it is crucial to remember that, as Aristotle aptly puts it, ‘patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet’. Patience necessitates faith that in the end, everything will unfold in a way that may surpass our expectations, even if it’s not the way we initially envisioned.

There is no patience without love because impatience can lead to negative emotions—hatred, jealousy, animosity, and more. These emotions can strain relationships and hinder personal growth. Therefore, cultivating patience is crucial for maintaining a peaceful and loving spiritual life.

In all relationships, no matter how challenging or disheartening they may seem, we must remember that if we genuinely love someone, we are compelled to be patient with them. This understanding and patience are the bedrock of any enduring relationship.